Insomnia ©

Dreaming of endless afternoon naps;
No sleep for the driven and only rest for the weak.
Visions of grandeur where greener pastures await;
Why wait? – Heaven on earth is at hand, and slumber is obsolete.
Sleep, why now? – I’ll have eternity when I’m gone;
Rest in peace, so long – but as for now, I’m in the zone...

Dreaming of endless afternoon naps;
Awakened by today’s agenda as my BlackBerry alerts in tone,
Rush through the day as if fate had declared my finale.
Chasing a mirage of success led by expectations set higher than the heavens corridors;
But I want more! Write my name in the sky with the cloud’s ink,
Immortalize my life on earth and let my name speak...
Aloud as I cry – no sleep for the driven, and only rest for the weak!

Dreaming of endless afternoon naps;
My nightmares of mediocrity suffocate any desires of complacency;
Face the giants of my path; pave the road for more to follow.
Swallow my pride if I there was any left, from what’s carried on my chest;
Humble beginnings bred the desire of outlasting all the rest.
Built from the ground up, and made to last until Victory’s peak.
And from the top I’ll scream – no sleep for the driven, and only rest for the weak!!

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Written by: Kalonji Abdul

..Drifting ©

Dreaming of yesterday...

The reflection of last week still appears in my smiles,
Hopeful about tomorrow as I go through uncertainty today,

Looking for the silver lining in what seems to be turmoil in mental motion pictures,
Making room for patience as human nature forces itself into every scene.

Quite naturally I should react or oppose as I was self-taught to achieve,
Believe in one self, anything else is postured to deceive;
I don't know you from Adam, or Eve – so why should I welcome your transgressions?
I have my own, so I try to right my wrongs - in some twisted type of manner.

Nevertheless when the banner is raised – today was needed,
As my crown achievement will display my accolades in the day after…

Living in the spirit of yesterday, hoping for a better tomorrow,
As today frustrates the hell out of me...

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Written by: Kalonji Abdul

Motive Me! ©

The stench of liquor and tobacco underlines every word from your filthy mouth,
Red-eyes, dirty fingernails and chapped lips accents the man I once proclaimed as King.
Those memories are fleeting as you display your ignorance in front of our children,
No more king, no more handsome prince, none of these things fit the beast that's on display today;
And I swear on everything I love, if you put your hands on me again – this day will be the final display!

I never had anything that didn't cost me something,
I never had an achievement that didn't cost me study,
Never was there a gift, that didn't require my money;
And neither was there growth that didn't require a storm – before my days were sunny.

But my love I have always given to you free from any debt,
And you used to love me freely even before your needs were met,
We matched equally and equally we contributed to our bond,
Enjoying ourselves as we built what I thought would never be out done.

That dream was destroyed as liquor enhanced your anger into 3-D movements across my face,
The nightmare continued as I stayed loyal to the punishment executed in every case.
It didn't matter the cause, and it never mattered the situation,
After the first taste, the next became second nature; as you forced your will into creation.

I've grown way too weary of this abuse and the use of your vocal to break my spirits,
I'm sick and tired of giving room for the excuses about your father's abusive ways,
I am not your mother, and even she cut that heathen short before her life ended in his rage!

So don't think today, you will have your way with me as you have in the days before,
I didn't get this gun for show, and I didn't load it to challenge your words with idle threats!
I'll let you do your usual dance, but don't think about taking my hand, to do your rage-filled Tango;
Because the first advance you make, will be the last chance you take,
and your last breathe will therefore follow…

..So gon' motivate me!

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Written by: Kalonji Abdul

Familiar Journeys ©

Yesterday I held your seat at the train terminal,
Same place, same time, the usual daily paper and decaf coffee;
You chose ESPN magazine and Coke Zero,
Contrast in our preferences in regards to morning taste,
But so much alike by mid-day; as our time continued at haste.

We had become so close in the routine of day-to-day,
Touch and go, stay and play,
Laugh and joke, Fuss and fight,
It didn't matter to us – we'd start over in our same familiar place.
I'll go to grab my newspaper, while you'd sit and hold my space.

The same train terminal, where we would meet to start the day,
Watching others come and go, as we built an eternal bond.
Although we descended from different mothers,
Brothers without the DNA – yet everything we set to do,
Together – it was surely done.

Brother where art thou, I asked;
Only to be disappointed with the results,
Yesterday was very hard on me;
But today I'm learning to cope.
Yesterday my friend rode a different train;
So today I'll try the ESPN – and zero calorie Coke.

Our destination has been the same as the years have come to pass,
Of course we never knew, or even considered, how long our trips would last.
Although our Father has called you on to another route;
The fact remains the same,
As on earth, you'll hold my space in heaven,
As I too – prepare to board that train...

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Written by: Kalonji Abdul

Broken Mirror ©

One body, one mind, one spirit and soul;
Comprised and many thoughts, contradictions and goals;
The reflection of a whole man, but distorted in pieces;
A simple plan turns complex, in this world of seasons;
Adapting to emotions, and dealing with feelings,
Changing with the winds, but undisclosed and revealing.
You can see it clearly, the reflection of humanity, all in one body.

Mentally drained and frustrated from conflict,
Overjoyed and elated in victory;
Chastised and badgered to defeat;
Edified and privileged with admiration.
The stumbling blocks used are worn from age,
Yet still efficient as they were in King David's days;
The best of two worlds, both good and evil, all in one mind.

The anchor that holds this old battleship at bay,
Strength of a thousand horses, never fatigued or weary,
Faith has no eyes, but its vision is never blurry,
No holds barred in this war for eternity,
Yes there are flaws, but only on the side of iniquity.
The spirit of the Most High embodied in the soul of one man.

You can see it all in the reflection of this mirror.
Broken into pieces, though you can view its truth,
Complex as it seems, but yet it's still a piece of you.
There's nothing hidden when you make time for reflection,
This mirror bares it all, while others conceal their convictions.
Take a moment to enjoy the pieces of me,
That's correct; I'm the broken mirror, a reflection of humanity.

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Written by: Kalonji Abdul

Unconditional ©

Without fail, I've been loved unconditionally,
With my spots and blemishes,
I have been honored among kings.
And it seems to me that true dedication is to bear the unbearable,
To love the unlovable and to cherish the soul that is imperfect but unique.

We often seek refuge in the arms of ourselves,
Hoping the world that sees our shortcomings doesn't pass us by for someone else;
But you, you have taken me and loved me for who I am.

With all that I have, I ask that you teach me to do as you have achieved,
To love unconditional and to support the imperfect man;
It seems that you have joy and comfort in the creases of your hand,
For it has not been a moment in which I can withstand,
The love that you give to the imperfect man…

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Written by: Kalonji Abdul